Almost a wedding

On Saturday we went to Jan's secretary's 20th wedding anniversary. It was very special. Jan and Marie have been working together for 13 years. The couple wanted to restate their wedding vows and declare their love for each other and as they felt that Jan knew them better than their pastor, they asked Jan to officiate. He felt honoured and prayed about what he should say. In the end he had a striking message:

God created woman to the assist the man. She was the last of His creation, i.e. the crown of His creation and therefore the most beautiful of the total creation. What a blessing for the man to have such beautiful assistant. She is also his equal. We have to benchmark our own marriages with the example of the marriage found in the Bible, i.e. marriage between Christ and his church. Our heavenly Bridegroom gave the best possible to his bride and took away her sin. In our marriages we have to give the best we have to our spouces and assist them to get rid of the bad in their lives. Furthermore, marriage can be compared with the replanting of two grownup trees in a new single excavation. These two trees have to start growing from start with their roots and branches intertwined into each other with the purpose to support one another to live closer to God and as a result of this to move closer to each other.


The happy couple Willem and Marie. We had drinks outside in the beautiful garden. On our way there, we went through a horrific storm - not a drizzle, a real cloud burst type downpour - but not a drop in Centurion where the reception was held. (As with the other weddings we recently went to, God has been really good in providing just the right weather!)

Jan talking to his boss Coen and his wife Elsa. (They had great misfortune in the thunderstorm - at the party they heard that thunder had struck their house and all the electrical appliances were hit... hope the damage was not really that bad!)

George and his lovely partner Sanet. George is one of Jan and Marie's colleagues.

Henriette, another colleague and great friend of Marie's.

Donna and Karin. We went to their beautiful wedding last year. Karin works with Jan and Marie.

They reception hall, beautifully decorated with shades of brown . There were several slide shows during the evening depicting Willem and Marie's lives. Koos and Susan are in the centre of this pic.

The tables had a high wooden candelabra in the middle of the table, which gave height, without spoiling the view. These were decorated with small hearts and crystals on thin brown ribbon. In front of each couple, there were these cute bouquets which held the place names. We could all take home our flowers in their rusty steel "bags". A lovely keepsake!

Jan handing the microphone to Marie and Willem for the restating of their vows. This time not the pastor's words, but written by themselves. "Your dreams are my dreams."

Exchanging rings.

We all got "medicine" in brown paper bags with written indications and warnings of the side effects...! (Sambara or something like that. In any case licorice liqour, which Willem and Marie and friends traditionally had on their many camping and fishing trips.)

Another keepsake that came with "medicine": Engraved shooter glasses.


Dancing and more dancing! If there is one thing most South Africans can do, it is "lekker dans!" We don't quite fall in that category, but Jan and I are working on it. I read in "How to prevent Alzheimers" that dancing is good for you, so we decided to also start dancing. Of course we only dance when there are lots of others dancing too, and then the place is crowded and it is extra difficult to dance freely. But watch this space... we are getting there and one of these days we'll be like those couples who do not care if they are the only couple on the floor! (The video of the dancing flopped, but guess what they were playing when this photo was taken? Boeremusiek of course!)
This party wasn't a wedding, but it looked and felt like it! Weddings are fun! Willem and Marie, may you be richly blessed during the next 40 years and beyond!

Hendrik's turns 27.

It was Hendrik's birthday on Thursday. Frans and Thelwyn took him to a show with some friends, so I had to babysit Martelize. I fetched her from her school for the first time. I found her swinging happily and I was greeted with a BIG smile.

She was as good as gold the whole time and did not even cry once. (Honestly! She really didn't.) I fed her, bathed her and put her in her cot to sleep at the appointed times and every time she happily obliged. What did I do to deserve such a good little grand baby girl? Martelize, as always, it was just pure joy to look after you!
Today (Sunday) we all celebrated Hendrik's birthday. The L's are househunting and the H's are getting the Malperthuis house ready as a weekend house. It's a privilege to dream with our children.

"Sharing a joke with Ouma. Ouma you are so funny and I am so friendly! Dis lekker op die plaas!"

"Look how my hair has grown! Ouma brushed it after bath time."

"At Tannie Lisa's baby shower on Saturday. I wore my camo outfit and everyone oohed and ahed. Tannie Lisa is expecting a little girl and I will play with her when we go with our parents to endurance rides and horse shows."

Two birthday boys: Hendrik and Gert's brother, Hannes. Hannes's birthday is on Monday.

"Riding horse on Oupa Jan is great fun."

Hendrik opening his gifts. He was thrilled with his Zulu CD rom, suitcases, special handtool and English Bible.

"What do we have here! " (Farao got a fright from the flash of the camera, not Franco - sorry Farao. The L's do not have a dog yet, and Jakkie and Farao were just as curious about Franco and he about them.)

"See, I can crawl fast, if there is something really interesting I need to investigate...!"

"Let me check your teeth. Everyone checks my four pearls and three other ones on the way every now and then."

A sniff from Jakkie.

"And the fun is spoiled, and my hands get a thorough wash... Oh well, we'll visit the farm again."

"Hi there, Cuz. Why are you chewing Ouma's red blanket?"

"Well hi there yourself! I was just watching you going all gaga over the dogs. I know dogs very well. Sandy and Zaran love me."

"What can I do now? I'm not feeling too grand - have a bit of a cold, so they won't let me play with Martelize, but still it's "lekker op die plaas." See you next week."

Back at work!

I started homeschooling Tamerin again this week. I thoroughly enjoyed it. She is such a blessing. I blogged about her first two days: it is actually amazing how much work we have accomplished already!

Jan has been suffering from anaemia for months. Iron pills have not helped, but recent tests show that the iron shots he's had in December have actually helped. (He has also been taking cayenne pepper capsules to stop bleeding. Are they the reason the iron is absorbed all of a sudden?) Anyway, we are really grateful that he does not have to go for drips in the hospital as was envisaged last year. However, he has to go for another round of shots. Ouch!

He has had quite a lot of physical activity this week. Hendrik has to move to another room in his commune and all his furniture has to come home. So Jan has been helping him every evening to load a cupboard/ a bed/ a table/ onto the bakkie. On top of this, our washing machine packed up and it had to be hauled out of the laundry, down three stairs and onto the bakkie and after it had been fixed, the processed had to be reversed again!

Today Jan helped with a community project to get rid of the "pom-pom" weed, growing next to the road. It was a massive job and not so funny in this heat! (Guess who did not want to use sunblock and guess who now has a red neck and face!) After returning at about 15:00 he started to water the garden and then he put up a shelve in the laundry. I'll keep him! Thank you Jesus for such a husband!

A tired Jan in front of my shelve. (10 guesses which rugby team we support...!)

I was also quite physically active this week. On Thursday I swam 86 x 20 m (1.7 km or a little more than a mile) in the gym pool. I have trained only once since swimming my 5th Midmar in 2007. (I did not train at all last year due to my mother. At least that was my excuse, I guess I could have made a plan to train and swim the Midmar if I had really wanted to! ) But now, I'd really like to swim it again, because I'm afraid that if I do not do it this year, I may never do it again. On Thursday I just wanted to see if I could still swim a mile and I managed reasonably well. I got a stitch in my side after 400 m, but it passed and the rest was not too bad. However, when I got out, I was too exhausted to shower - it took all my effort just to get dressed!

On Friday Tamerin and I did ten minute sessions on the cycles and on the rowing machines. When we lay on the mats to do abs exercises, I felt the beginning of a muscle spasm and my knees hurt a bit. Now I am afraid: did I hurt myself by swimming a mile without any recent training? Should I train again in the next three weeks or should I just spare myself and hope for the best? How much can anyone train in just three weeks anyway?

I fetched Franco and took him home on Friday. Unfortunately I left my camera in the car, so now there are no photos of Franco this week! I'm sorry I was too lazy to go and fetch it, because he looked so cute in his red jumpsuit. He has 4 teeth now! He says "words" that he did not say a week ago. Then it was only baby sounds, but now he says over and over "ky da" (At least that's what it sounds like to me! (Not pappa/ mamma/ ouma!) He is 8 months and three weeks. Will try to take a video clip next time I see him.

The H's went to a endurance ride this morning - not to ride but to be time keepers. They were pretty tired when they arrived here, but Martelize was full of beans. She tried her level best to crawl: she can pull her knees up under her bum, but her arms do not co-operate yet. Her favourite toy is now a soft ball and she was very interested in the texture of the upholstery. She is 5 1/2 months old.

Martelize and her ball.

Hendrik C and Sharon's Kwasizabantu Wedding

Warning: This post is about a very interesting wedding, but it is rather a long post... sorry! It is especially for the benefit of all the family and friends who couldn't make it.

On Saturday we went to Kwasizabantu Mission in Kwazulu-Natal for my sister Elsabe's son, Hendrik's wedding. The C's have been part of this mission for about 20 years. This mission station is the centre of revival among the Zulus and many miracles happen there. (It is worthwhile to check out their website.) Hendrik C is the 4th child of Koos and Elsabe to get married at Kwasizabantu - his twin brother Martin is the only one not married yet.

What makes their marriages so remarkable is that the bride and groom actually only get to know each other after the wedding. If a man gets a message from God that he should marry a particular girl, he discusses this with his counsellor who then relays the message to the girl's parents. The girl then prays about the proposal and if she is convinced that it is God's will that they should get married, they get engaged in church in front of the congregation: the groom never speaks to or touches his fiance. The pastor puts the ring on the girls finger. All communication is done through other people. Their relationship only starts after the wedding. Chastity - not only in the flesh, but also in thought, is of utmost importance. Do these marriages work? Certainly! What we see in those who have been married like this, is love, peace and well behaved, happy children. (Jan and I believe that a marriage will be successful if God is the main partner in the marriage - whether the couple has had a relationship before the wedding or not: the main thing is that they are obedient to God! But we respect the KZB people's way of doing things, and they respect ours.)

On our way there, dark clouds gathered! When it finally started to rain, it poured and poured...! Parts of the road from Mooiriver was covered in mist and there were quite a few nasty potholes in the road, so the going was so very easy, but we all arrived safely and had a lovely meal at the Stegens house.

The F's from the Free State were also there as well as Tannie Babs from Pietermaritzburg. She is the only one of my father's generation who is still alive. And boy is she alive! At 86, she still walks easily and climbs up stairs without help and she is as bright as ever. It was wonderful chatting to her, especially about my grandparents. (My Ouma Anne was a friend of poets like Eugene Marais and she befriended many white Russians who fled to Pretoria at the time of the revolution.) Here Wally and Tannie Babs are having breakfast on the morning of the wedding. The best part about family weddings is ample opportunity to visit and catch up. (Of course we had Bonle yoghurt, one of KZB's dairy products. It is very, very good.)

The rest of the Free State clan sat inside the large sitting room. I am not sure how many families live in this beautiful, big Stegen house, but as far as I know all Ruth's sisters + husbands + children live there. The children have a royal time with all the cousins under one roof and they all speak German, English, Afrikaans and Zulu.

Ruth (Dirk C's wife) with Joshua. He is a miracle baby: he was born with some rare syndrome. All his intestines developed outside his body, but were pushed back through his naval after birth. His tongue was too large and he had a dark stain all over his little face. Today he is 2 years old and he speaks very well and the facial stain has disappeared. (No surgery, no special treatment!) You can hardly believe that this beautiful child was once a "disfigured" little baby. Ruth is expecting her fourth child in 3 weeks time - another little boy.

A tandem shoulder massage: Wally having the time of his life with wife Jessica massaging him and his mother Anne giving Jessica a rub.

After breakfast Dirk C took us in a kombi to have a quick look at the different facilities at KZB: they have a wonderful school, a college, avo orchards (is that the right word?), massive hothouses for green peppers, a bakery, a dairy, the Aquelle factory etc. etc. They never ask for donations but provide food for more than a 1000 people every day. Here is Marianne, Anne's daughter. In the background a friend who wanted to visit KZB.

Ruth and Dirk's older children, Arno and Ria. Arno will be going to Grade 2 this year and Ria to Grade R (reception year). They were part of the wedding procession. The theme of the wedding was pink and soft green. The "wall" behind them was crates of Aquelle water bottles. The auditorium of KZB burned down last year, so church services and weddings are now held in the reception area of the water factory. These crates were stacked to keep the wind and rain out - fortunately it did not rain at the time of the wedding!

The burnt down auditorium: it seated more than 10,000 people. I remember when Dirk and Ruth got married there, it was packed to capacity! When Dirk took us on a Blitz tour of KZB just before the wedding , we got a pre-glimpse of the bride. They were taking wedding photos there! One day they'll be able to say, this is where we would have got married, but instead we got married in a factory!
The rebuilding of the auditorium will commence soon.

Ethie, Thelwyn and Ruth. Thelwyn came with Eugenie and Ethie. They left Pretoria at 3:00 am to be there at time for the 11:00 wedding. They left again at 16:00 and Thelwyn was home at 23:00. Quite a long day, but very worthwhile. Gert and Dorette couldn't come: two 7 hour trips with a baby were not on!

Waiting for the service to begin. The family were privileged to sit in front. Can you imagine how hot or cold it could have been in there? But it wasn't. God provided the perfect weather.

Even a factory can be made to look special for the nuptials. The flower decorations were beautiful and empty wooden crates were stacked to make a very interesting backdrop.

Cobus, Netta and their children Jan (3) and Elsabe (4). Evan (Ethelwyn's eldest) sat with them and he was as good as gold. He is going to grade 1 this year.

The "aangedane" groom, Hendrik, with his identical twin brother, Martin, next to him. (As I was not the photographer, I couldn't very well jump up and take photos of the bride as she entered!)

Sharon and Hendrik sitting down for their wedding service. Church services here are quite long, because everything has to be interpreted into Zulu. Pastor Stegen is German himself but fluent in English, Afrikaans and Zulu. Sometimes the pastor switches to Zulu himself and then the sermon has to be interpreted into English! The interpretor's really got to know his stuff! At the back of the hall someone interprets the sermon into French.

After the wedding service, we had to go to the back of the factory for family wedding photos. We had to know our step as it was quite muddy from earlier rain. Hendrik wanted a photo of the Aquelle truck and his silly mother took a photo of the trailer instead of the truck! Hendrik stayed with the C's the week before the wedding. He helped with some jobs at KZB and had a great time. The highlight probably was a ride in one of these trucks. Trucks have always fascinated him.

Here's the truck! Hendrik was not too impressed with the photo, because it does not show the entire truck! Sorry Hendrik! But the people were waiting for us for the family wedding photos!

Our side of the family. Tannie Babs (86) is really tiny isn't she? Ria (nearly 5 years) is almost as tall as she is!

My two sisters, Elsabe (mother of the groom) and Lalie with Tannie Babs.

The family walking back round the factory - chatting all the way. Weddings are fun!

Back: Ria, Arno, Evan
Front: Joshua, Jan, Elsabe
Little Joshua in the white shirt, was not too keen on posing here with the others, but his sis Ria and brother Arno looked after him. He is only 2 but already very tall!
The Stegens have a lovely garden so many wedding photos were taken there. I tried to sneak a few, but was not really successful - besides the official photographer, there were many other photographers so I couldn't really get close.

Quess what we drank? Elsabe and Anne (previous mother of the groom)

Neil and Marissa - the previous groom and bride. See previous post Dec 21 (Scroll down here.)

Ethie, Eugenie and Thelyn - still smiling despite their early start and long journey (Nogal in hulle kerkklere gery! )

Elsabe's daughters Netta and Ethelwyn with Hananiel in the background and Almarie in front.

Beautiful place setting with Biltong and a freshly baked bun for a starter.

Our table: Tannie Babs talking to Lalie and Anne, Gene and Ethie discussing something.

The only pic I got of Hendrik and Sharon. We are looking forward to our family reunion at the end of the year so that we can get to know her. She is a niece of Ruth and has German South African grandparents and Swiss grandparents. We were treated to power point presentations of Hendrik's life (from early childhood in the Kalahari till his present job in the hothouses) and Sharon's Swiss grandparents with photos of Sharon at various ages on snow skis.

The main table. (It is not wine in the "wine" bottle, but grape juice.)

Jan and I left on Monday morning. We stopped at Koos and Elsabe's house to pick up Hendrik and of course to visit some more. As Jan says, "The difference between the Afrikaners and the French is that the French don't say good-bye when they leave and the Afrikaners don't leave when they say good-bye!" He, he.
Oom Hendrik with Hananiel, Evan with Jan and Oom Jan with Elsabe.

A taste of the church choir... especially for our overseas friends and family. When have you last heard Zulu voices? The KZB brass band also played very well, but the video clip was a dissapointing flop.

Ethelwyn gives support while the C children sing for their uncle and his new wife. Netta at the piano.