Hendrik C and Sharon's Kwasizabantu Wedding

Warning: This post is about a very interesting wedding, but it is rather a long post... sorry! It is especially for the benefit of all the family and friends who couldn't make it.

On Saturday we went to Kwasizabantu Mission in Kwazulu-Natal for my sister Elsabe's son, Hendrik's wedding. The C's have been part of this mission for about 20 years. This mission station is the centre of revival among the Zulus and many miracles happen there. (It is worthwhile to check out their website.) Hendrik C is the 4th child of Koos and Elsabe to get married at Kwasizabantu - his twin brother Martin is the only one not married yet.

What makes their marriages so remarkable is that the bride and groom actually only get to know each other after the wedding. If a man gets a message from God that he should marry a particular girl, he discusses this with his counsellor who then relays the message to the girl's parents. The girl then prays about the proposal and if she is convinced that it is God's will that they should get married, they get engaged in church in front of the congregation: the groom never speaks to or touches his fiance. The pastor puts the ring on the girls finger. All communication is done through other people. Their relationship only starts after the wedding. Chastity - not only in the flesh, but also in thought, is of utmost importance. Do these marriages work? Certainly! What we see in those who have been married like this, is love, peace and well behaved, happy children. (Jan and I believe that a marriage will be successful if God is the main partner in the marriage - whether the couple has had a relationship before the wedding or not: the main thing is that they are obedient to God! But we respect the KZB people's way of doing things, and they respect ours.)

On our way there, dark clouds gathered! When it finally started to rain, it poured and poured...! Parts of the road from Mooiriver was covered in mist and there were quite a few nasty potholes in the road, so the going was so very easy, but we all arrived safely and had a lovely meal at the Stegens house.

The F's from the Free State were also there as well as Tannie Babs from Pietermaritzburg. She is the only one of my father's generation who is still alive. And boy is she alive! At 86, she still walks easily and climbs up stairs without help and she is as bright as ever. It was wonderful chatting to her, especially about my grandparents. (My Ouma Anne was a friend of poets like Eugene Marais and she befriended many white Russians who fled to Pretoria at the time of the revolution.) Here Wally and Tannie Babs are having breakfast on the morning of the wedding. The best part about family weddings is ample opportunity to visit and catch up. (Of course we had Bonle yoghurt, one of KZB's dairy products. It is very, very good.)

The rest of the Free State clan sat inside the large sitting room. I am not sure how many families live in this beautiful, big Stegen house, but as far as I know all Ruth's sisters + husbands + children live there. The children have a royal time with all the cousins under one roof and they all speak German, English, Afrikaans and Zulu.

Ruth (Dirk C's wife) with Joshua. He is a miracle baby: he was born with some rare syndrome. All his intestines developed outside his body, but were pushed back through his naval after birth. His tongue was too large and he had a dark stain all over his little face. Today he is 2 years old and he speaks very well and the facial stain has disappeared. (No surgery, no special treatment!) You can hardly believe that this beautiful child was once a "disfigured" little baby. Ruth is expecting her fourth child in 3 weeks time - another little boy.

A tandem shoulder massage: Wally having the time of his life with wife Jessica massaging him and his mother Anne giving Jessica a rub.

After breakfast Dirk C took us in a kombi to have a quick look at the different facilities at KZB: they have a wonderful school, a college, avo orchards (is that the right word?), massive hothouses for green peppers, a bakery, a dairy, the Aquelle factory etc. etc. They never ask for donations but provide food for more than a 1000 people every day. Here is Marianne, Anne's daughter. In the background a friend who wanted to visit KZB.

Ruth and Dirk's older children, Arno and Ria. Arno will be going to Grade 2 this year and Ria to Grade R (reception year). They were part of the wedding procession. The theme of the wedding was pink and soft green. The "wall" behind them was crates of Aquelle water bottles. The auditorium of KZB burned down last year, so church services and weddings are now held in the reception area of the water factory. These crates were stacked to keep the wind and rain out - fortunately it did not rain at the time of the wedding!

The burnt down auditorium: it seated more than 10,000 people. I remember when Dirk and Ruth got married there, it was packed to capacity! When Dirk took us on a Blitz tour of KZB just before the wedding , we got a pre-glimpse of the bride. They were taking wedding photos there! One day they'll be able to say, this is where we would have got married, but instead we got married in a factory!
The rebuilding of the auditorium will commence soon.

Ethie, Thelwyn and Ruth. Thelwyn came with Eugenie and Ethie. They left Pretoria at 3:00 am to be there at time for the 11:00 wedding. They left again at 16:00 and Thelwyn was home at 23:00. Quite a long day, but very worthwhile. Gert and Dorette couldn't come: two 7 hour trips with a baby were not on!

Waiting for the service to begin. The family were privileged to sit in front. Can you imagine how hot or cold it could have been in there? But it wasn't. God provided the perfect weather.

Even a factory can be made to look special for the nuptials. The flower decorations were beautiful and empty wooden crates were stacked to make a very interesting backdrop.

Cobus, Netta and their children Jan (3) and Elsabe (4). Evan (Ethelwyn's eldest) sat with them and he was as good as gold. He is going to grade 1 this year.

The "aangedane" groom, Hendrik, with his identical twin brother, Martin, next to him. (As I was not the photographer, I couldn't very well jump up and take photos of the bride as she entered!)

Sharon and Hendrik sitting down for their wedding service. Church services here are quite long, because everything has to be interpreted into Zulu. Pastor Stegen is German himself but fluent in English, Afrikaans and Zulu. Sometimes the pastor switches to Zulu himself and then the sermon has to be interpreted into English! The interpretor's really got to know his stuff! At the back of the hall someone interprets the sermon into French.

After the wedding service, we had to go to the back of the factory for family wedding photos. We had to know our step as it was quite muddy from earlier rain. Hendrik wanted a photo of the Aquelle truck and his silly mother took a photo of the trailer instead of the truck! Hendrik stayed with the C's the week before the wedding. He helped with some jobs at KZB and had a great time. The highlight probably was a ride in one of these trucks. Trucks have always fascinated him.

Here's the truck! Hendrik was not too impressed with the photo, because it does not show the entire truck! Sorry Hendrik! But the people were waiting for us for the family wedding photos!

Our side of the family. Tannie Babs (86) is really tiny isn't she? Ria (nearly 5 years) is almost as tall as she is!

My two sisters, Elsabe (mother of the groom) and Lalie with Tannie Babs.

The family walking back round the factory - chatting all the way. Weddings are fun!

Back: Ria, Arno, Evan
Front: Joshua, Jan, Elsabe
Little Joshua in the white shirt, was not too keen on posing here with the others, but his sis Ria and brother Arno looked after him. He is only 2 but already very tall!
The Stegens have a lovely garden so many wedding photos were taken there. I tried to sneak a few, but was not really successful - besides the official photographer, there were many other photographers so I couldn't really get close.

Quess what we drank? Elsabe and Anne (previous mother of the groom)

Neil and Marissa - the previous groom and bride. See previous post Dec 21 (Scroll down here.)

Ethie, Eugenie and Thelyn - still smiling despite their early start and long journey (Nogal in hulle kerkklere gery! )

Elsabe's daughters Netta and Ethelwyn with Hananiel in the background and Almarie in front.

Beautiful place setting with Biltong and a freshly baked bun for a starter.

Our table: Tannie Babs talking to Lalie and Anne, Gene and Ethie discussing something.

The only pic I got of Hendrik and Sharon. We are looking forward to our family reunion at the end of the year so that we can get to know her. She is a niece of Ruth and has German South African grandparents and Swiss grandparents. We were treated to power point presentations of Hendrik's life (from early childhood in the Kalahari till his present job in the hothouses) and Sharon's Swiss grandparents with photos of Sharon at various ages on snow skis.

The main table. (It is not wine in the "wine" bottle, but grape juice.)

Jan and I left on Monday morning. We stopped at Koos and Elsabe's house to pick up Hendrik and of course to visit some more. As Jan says, "The difference between the Afrikaners and the French is that the French don't say good-bye when they leave and the Afrikaners don't leave when they say good-bye!" He, he.
Oom Hendrik with Hananiel, Evan with Jan and Oom Jan with Elsabe.

A taste of the church choir... especially for our overseas friends and family. When have you last heard Zulu voices? The KZB brass band also played very well, but the video clip was a dissapointing flop.

Ethelwyn gives support while the C children sing for their uncle and his new wife. Netta at the piano.